Mommy: He didn't answer the phone.
Little Man: That probably means he's dead.
Mommy: You've been watching too much TV.
September 9, 2013
Mommy: Can I see your [school] folder?
Little Man: Wait, I just need to tell you something first. I got 3 bad notes today.
Mommy: Why?
Little Man: My brain just wasn't working right today.
Mommy: Why not?
Little Man: Because I accidentally got soap in my mouth and then I stood on my head for a long time so the soap went into my brain. So my brain wasn't working right today.
Little Man: Wait, I just need to tell you something first. I got 3 bad notes today.
Mommy: Why?
Little Man: My brain just wasn't working right today.
Mommy: Why not?
Little Man: Because I accidentally got soap in my mouth and then I stood on my head for a long time so the soap went into my brain. So my brain wasn't working right today.
August 25, 2013
Note from the school nurse:
Benjamin was complaining of a stomach ache. He said it was because mom put a bug in his milk this morning.
Benjamin was complaining of a stomach ache. He said it was because mom put a bug in his milk this morning.
August 15, 2013
Little Man: Mommy, I really like my new school.
Mommy: Good! Why do you like it so much?
Little Man: Because it's easy and the teachers are crazy like me.
Mommy: Good! Why do you like it so much?
Little Man: Because it's easy and the teachers are crazy like me.
June 2, 2013
Little Man: Mommy, are you wearing make-up?
Mommy: No.
Little Man: You should, because it would make you look younger.
Mommy: Where did you learn that?
Little Man: I heard it on TV.
Mommy: No.
Little Man: You should, because it would make you look younger.
Mommy: Where did you learn that?
Little Man: I heard it on TV.
May 27, 2013
Mommy, wouldn't it be nice if we didn't have to use money in this world? Then we could just all have whatever we wanted.
May 15, 2013
Little Man: Mommy, why do you have all these boxes?
Mommy: They are for a friend at work.
Little Man: But why are they broken?
Mommy: I broke them down to fit them in my car. She's going to put them back together and use them to move.
Little Man: Oooooh, I get it. She's a box maker.
Mommy: They are for a friend at work.
Little Man: But why are they broken?
Mommy: I broke them down to fit them in my car. She's going to put them back together and use them to move.
Little Man: Oooooh, I get it. She's a box maker.
April 7, 2013
Mommy, I need to tell you something. Grandy has a lot of crinkles on her face like DanDan. But GiGi doesn't have any crinkles on her face.
April 2, 2013
Little Man: Mommy, can I put a tattoo on Solo (the dog)?
Mommy: No, it won't work because he has fur.
Little Man: ..... please?
Mommy: No, it won't work because he has fur.
Little Man: ..... please?
March 12, 2013
Mommy, I need to tell you something. You are not supposed to kiss anybody on the lips unless you are married to them, ok?
March 1, 2013
Little Man: Mommy, let's move and get a bigger house.
Mommy: This house is already too big for us!
Little Man: No it's not. Let's get something REALLY big and then we can get a lot of dogs.
Mommy: This house is already too big for us!
Little Man: No it's not. Let's get something REALLY big and then we can get a lot of dogs.
February 15, 2013
(kisses Mommy)
Little Man: Ewwww!! What is on your LIPS?!
Mommy: Lip gloss.
Little Man: Gross! It's all sticky! I can't get it off!
January 7, 2013
Mommy: Why are you wearing a different shirt from this morning?
Little Man: Well, I was on the playground and I fell in dog poop. So the teacher sent me to the nurse. The nurse took off my shirt, and she saw my belly. Then she gave me a new shirt.
Little Man: Well, I was on the playground and I fell in dog poop. So the teacher sent me to the nurse. The nurse took off my shirt, and she saw my belly. Then she gave me a new shirt.
December 20, 2012
Little Man: How come we leave cookies and milk for Santa, but nothing for the reindeer?
Mom: The reindeer don't come down the chimney.
Little Man: I want to leave carrots out and then Santa can take them up to the reindeer, because the reindeer are gonna be hungry, too.
Mom: The reindeer don't come down the chimney.
Little Man: I want to leave carrots out and then Santa can take them up to the reindeer, because the reindeer are gonna be hungry, too.
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